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Do you believe in what you say you don't believe in? What would happen if you started to wonder? Do you fear wonder? Should we be open minded to the point that we might disagree with our school of thought as is today, tomorrow?

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I began studying Psychology about a year-and-a-half ago. I am a student in the Advantage Program meaning my 18 week courses are condensed into 8 weeks with assignments more relative to actual happenings and experiences versus solely memorizing textbooks and protocol.

I've been a Christian all my life. I was not raised in an intense religious family. They were spiritual, absolutely, but not in a holy sense. Outside of some family members, the majority on one side of the family is highly intrigued by that of paranormal activity. By this fantasy-driven and curiosity consumer motivation, I saw a lot. At a young age, I began attending Sunday school and bible camps.

More often, the bar in our basement was filled by strangers in costumes sleeping with her husband and her female bisexual neighbor and more. It was chaos!

The music was loud, personalities exaggerated or depressed and people lost their filter. It was all the rage. I witnessed addiction, swinging couples, pornographic films, horror movies and horrific scenes at home by these parties and our sweet guests.

The rule in the morning was to avoid waking the guests as we'd ready for the school bus. If it were a weekend, I'd tip toe down the stairs and out the door to sit on top of my swing set and stare into the clouds. I was a Psychologist already, questioning why people did what they did and discerning if they would improve or decline. I decided I wanted to live life differently. The most opposite thing to do was to dive into learning about what true love actually looked and acted like. That was my drive into the supernatural.

For a period of time, I became an extremist. I was obsessed with and codependent on my world view and perspectives. If you did not agree with me, you were not safe, in my mind and the minds of those around me. If you did not agree with my convictions then you were in need of prayer and rebirth.

Do you believe in what you say you don't believe in? What would happen if you started to wonder? Do you fear wonder? Should we be open minded to the point that we might disagree with our school of thought as is today, tomorrow?

I began to wonder. Only more and more since experiencing much pain, loss, some abuse and other hardships at a young age. I began to wonder about love and why it seems so limited. About God, and how big we say He is yet how small we can make him out to be sometimes. I wonder if Satan really is real or if mental illnesses and a lack of humility prides us to blame him for absolutely every wrong action and thought. I wonder if that limits us from actually healing our wounds by not admitting to what we actually can change?

I wonder if we should even be aloud to pray against something someone is pursuing (a perspective, a hobby, a marriage, anything) if we have yet to empathize with them truly. I wonder if some people actually trust God or, if they just say they do to keep on good terms with fellow believers. I wonder if prayer was so powerful, would people be able to pray in silence and in private and would that be enough for them? Or is it the riots and picket signs at abortion clinics and a transgender's story time at the local library that bring that spiritual connection and adrenaline rush? I wonder where the simplicity went and when unconditional love became so conditional.

Do you wonder? What do you wonder? Do you feel you have the freedom to wonder or if you think it unwise or not safe? I believe that if you feel that asking questions and opening your mind to other cultures, world views is wrong, than you may not be as free as proclaimed.

What if free will meant free will? What if unconditional love remained unconditional? What if God was so big that He showed himself in a monastery as a Monk? What if we wondered more? Would our wonder about how big God is become unlimited? Would we fear less and love more and live ever more simply?

Do you wonder? What do you wonder?


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Vivia Leigh

Clarity Coach | Author

What is a Clarity Coach? It is Vivia's own title separating her services from life coaching. In your Clarity Sessions, Vivia will meet you where you are without judgement of your situation or personal convictions. Vivia works as a mentor supporting you from her knowledge as a Psychology Major. While she is not yet a licensed therapist, Vivia is gifted in being the bridge standing in the gap between her clients and further support from the appropriate therapy style. 

Many therapists my use Vivia to connect them with more clients who truly need their support from grief therapy, to AA groups, Play Therapy, EMDR, or simply, psychotherapy.

It is Vivia's goal to support you as best as she can while utilizing her worksheets found in THE GIRL WHO CRIED FORGIVENESS. When she feels you need further support, she'll help make that happen, so you can simply recieve.

Based in Leawood, KS

Currently meeting via phone calls and video chats as to follow COVID protocol.


Appointment only, made via email:

Introduction Session: $50 

Hourly Sessions: $75

Payments non-refundable,

with a $50 cancellation fee.

Payable via Venmo upon scheduling

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